I want to be a good parent

Bismillah.

I've recently got transferred to special ward. Obstetric/gynae & paediatric ward. That mean an additional for me to handle with kids.

Kids??!!
Me??!!

Okay.
Hahahahaha..

Well thats odd cause i am not really into kids. I mean i'm not exposed to kids because my surrounding is not really with kids. I really love elderly than kids. Maybe i am just not used to kids.

So now i have to change the direction of course. I must be friendly with kids.

Just now i've witnessed a romantic family. Aaaaaa!!! Sangat sweet!! I served the meds to the kid. He was sleeping, so i told his parents to give the meds and wake him up.

Both mom and dad wake him up in a very gentle and cuddly way.
They talked softly to him.
So sweet.
So cute.
And so cuddly!!!!

So, i want to be a mother and hopefully got a husband just like that.
One happy family ;)

My dear baby

Muhammad Haikal, mama will miss you.

Its time for you to get a decent family to take care of you.

Its really breaking my heart to let my foster son taken away by another family.

He is really a wonderful boy from paradise.

I met him when he was 1 years old.

He is so cute and cuddly, shy and sweet.

I decided to make him as my foster child on the spot.

I don't know why but i felt 'a tick' the moment he came near me.

I told him to call me mama. He said it with a very cute voice.

Oh how i will miss him.

When i got time, i will meet him at his home 'Darul Hanan'.

Yes, he is unfortunate child that his parents died due to an accident.

Soon i heard the news that a family wanted to adopt him, it really breaks my heart.

I couldn't say a word. We are so closed together. I will meet him whenever i am sad or happy.

I know that i'm not suitable to be his parents due to my single status and also his medical status.

But i love him.

Muhammad Haikal, mama loves you.

Its really breaking up my heart when i have to tell him that he will be with another nice family.

'Ikal, nanti ikal dah ada mak ayah baru. Nanti dieorg jumpa ikal. Ikal dah ada rumah best. Ikal dah tak duduk kat sini tau.'

His cuddly face, playing with the ironman.

I have to really hold up my tears as i can't see him anymore, in 2 weeks from now.

My love towards him grows deeper and deeper since the day i met him.

If i didn't come for a long period, he will like 'mama! Ikal ma!

Oh Ikal, mama will really miss you sayang.
I love you so much.
It seems like kita tak ada jodoh.
Goodbye my dear.
I hope that you will remember me always in your heart.
Be good to your new family okay.
Remember all the memories we've been together okay?

I love you Ikal ;')

Tak suka

Aku tak suka bila orang dapat membaca diriku yang sebenar.
Dan dia berjaya membaca diriku.
Ahh..
95% tepat.
Kagum dengan penafsiran dia tetapi aku lebih selesa jika ia menjadi rahsia diri.

Rahsiaku kini dia tahu.
Aku malu kerana dia dapat membaca dan memahami diriku.
Bukan membenci tetapi aku pun tidak mengerti dengan realiti diriku sendiri.